Michael Phelps Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #120

Hello 2009!

The street name for the Michael Phelps Halloween Costume is Weedies (Wheaties). I originally didn't make the connection to the venerable gold-medal record-breaking Olympiad because the ears are just so huge on this scruffy guy. But on closer inspection, the medals around the neck, the goggles, the swimmer's cap and the bong in hand are telltale signs of the character. Now, the Michael Phelps Halloween Costume presents a conflicting twofold problem. One, parading around as a disgraced persona, a troubled athlete, a fallen media darling and jumping on the crazy "idolize then demonize" train of modern media is just not good karma, dude. Two, camera-friendly Michael Phelps seems to be rebounding nicely from his questionable judgement with continued public support which doesn't make for an outstanding Halloween costume. However, if you decided to rock the Speedo, too... eh, never mind, just don't do it.

The Michael Phelps Halloween Costume is available from Ricky's.

Sherlock Holmes Golfer Halloween Costume for Dog

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #104

From the 2007 Archives:

Have to domesticate, I mean, humiliate your house beast? Try this Sherlock Holmes Halloween Costume for dogs. Actually, I think it’s really an outfit for pups ready to hit the links. Either way, with the tartan tam and bow tie, Sherlock Dog wistfully reminds me of Greyfriars Bobby. Bloody hell, it’s wrong but so precious.

The Sherlock Holmes Halloween Costume is available from Target.

Child Sumo Wrestler Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #30

From the 2006 Archives:

The Child Sumo Wrestler Halloween Costume celebrates chub with a little more grace and a thong.  But parents, have you not been listening to all Halloween safety warnings?  Razor blades in apples, crack in fun-size snickers?  Costumes that are non-reflective and immobile?  Do you even know how easy it would be to roll one of these little kid sumo wrestlers into the back seat of an unmarked white cargo van?  Please, use some common sense.  Say, "sayonara" to the Child Sumo Wrestler Halloween Costume.