Dog Shalom Rabbi Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume#105

From the 2007 Archives:

I like this Dog Shalom Rabbi Halloween Costume because the royal blue yarmulke and Star of David sash perfectly complement the weimaraner’s skin tone and somber expression. The dachshund, however, is just plain ridiculous.

Sherlock Holmes Golfer Halloween Costume for Dog

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #104

From the 2007 Archives:

Have to domesticate, I mean, humiliate your house beast? Try this Sherlock Holmes Halloween Costume for dogs. Actually, I think it’s really an outfit for pups ready to hit the links. Either way, with the tartan tam and bow tie, Sherlock Dog wistfully reminds me of Greyfriars Bobby. Bloody hell, it’s wrong but so precious.

The Sherlock Holmes Halloween Costume is available from Target.

Dog Mermaid Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #96

From the 2007 Archives:

I haven’t seen anything this cryptozoologically incorrect since Cheetah and Ma saw that ostrich-grizzly last summer. Costume + Pets = Bad. Costumes Restricting Hindquarter Mobility + Pets= Worse. A great new cause for Ellen.

The Dog Mermaid Halloween Costume is available from Ebay.

Harem Concubine Halloween Costume for Dogs

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #87

From the 2007 Archives:

It’s one thing for you to slut it up for Halloween but must you drag your dog into it? The Harem-Concubine-Belly Dancer Dog Halloween Costume (and photograph, for that matter) is plain dog porn horrific. Like Paris Hilton, this dog’s beauty is destroyed by indulgent over-crapccessorizing. It’s time for a revolution. Say no to puppy mills and say no to Harem Dog!

Christmas Holiday Santa Cat Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #83
From the 2007 Archives:

Who says this cat kills its owner in his sleep? Nothing chimes Holiday Spirit less than a feline in a Santa hat and matching holly scarf. Be prepared for a Dickensian intervention. Tip #1: Nobody will fawn over your Christmas cat. They will be too busy questioning your mental soundness. Tip #2: If your cat tolerates this outfit, what you own is not a cat.

Suicide Bomber Watch Dog Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #82
From the 2007 Archives:

So the official name of this Halloween costume is “Watch Dog” but whom are we kidding? This outfit is straight up modern suicide bomber. Yeah, this costume is future-weapons scary but like your dog’s going to get confiscated, arrested and sent to GitMo, blown up in a counter-terrorism move and/or become a martyr/poster mutt for the jihad. And look at this poor pooch’s face. He knows he’s about to be sent into dangerous territory. It’s not his fault that he’s innately predisposed to trade his life for the Milkbone sign up bonus. ALALALALA! Someone contact the ASPCA/United Nations ASAP!

Hippie Dog Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #66

From the 2007 Archives:

Someone call Cesar Milan. I said it last year and I’ll say it again this year, forcing your pet to wear clothes – be it tutus, antlers or full on costume garb – is barbaric and ridiculous. Fido is not down with this Hippie Dog Halloween Costume, you stoner! Stop corrupting him with your free-love ways!
.

Yoda Halloween Costume for Dogs

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #28

From the 2006 Archives:

Listen up, I'm only going to say this once.  Pets are not meant to wear costumes.  Particularly the Yoda Halloween Costume for Dogs.  I don't care how cutesy they are, it's not right.  This is why, when The Machine, D2 and I were younger and stuck a pearl necklace and a pair of shorts on D2's mutt Einstein, he promptly took a crap in 'em.  Nature was rebelling against man's inhumanity.  I don't even want to THINK about what would happen if all the neighborhood dogs became little Yodas for the night.  Besides, I highly doubt the pooch in the picture is actually wearing this costume.  It looks entirely photoshopped.