Anorexia Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #147

The Anorexia Halloween Costume (Anna Rexia Halloween Costume) is the ultimate exploitation of disturbing diseases.  Some companies also refer to this costume as the Nicole Riche Halloween Costume which is just plain wrong.  The Anorexia Halloween Costume exploits serious social, psychological and physical illness and all under the guise of a skeleton-plastered nurse's uniform.  Medical professionals can sometimes wield their knowledge to become the sickest, most hypochondriacal ones of the bunch but unless the wearer of the Anorexia Halloween Costume is stick-thin, these duds will just appear to be from the Graveyard ER collection.  Another example of a play on words not quite translating in the visual realm.

Octomom Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #144

The Octomom "Womb Raider" Halloween Costume posits Nadya Suleman, America's favorite baby-obsessed, collagen-friendly, Angelina Jolie-lookalike, with Mrs. Brad Pitt's star-making turn as Laura Croft in Tomb Raider. Octomom features plastic tubby babies - presumably ammunition for or against the paparazzi and social services - affixed to the most bad-ass snugly ever... a criss-crossing ass-kicking bandolier which is perfect for anyone refusing to take nature's no for an answer.

The Octomom "Womb Raider" Halloween Costume is available from Rickys.

Flasher Granny Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #112

From the 2007 Archives:

Apparently the industry lacks a learning curve as someone’s gotten into the plungers and moldy Easy Cheese again. Flasher Granny also comes in a Flasher Gramps version. A few years ago my Aunt JoJo was flashed by a geezer on a Florida beach. And yo, NOBODY wanted to see that.  True funny stands on its own.  Shock isn’t necessary.  So pull up those knee-highs and keep it buttoned up!

The Flasher Granny Halloween Costume is available from Halloween Fashions.

Crazy Cat Lady Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #99

From the 2007 Archives:

Crazy Cat Ladies are naturally scary and demented and shouldn’t be exploited even if they pass out weird Halloween treats like figs or kibble and you don’t really want to solicit their houses but end up on their porch ‘cuz the older kids dare you. Heaven forbid a Crazy Cat Lady Costume should meet a real Crazy Cat Lady. The universe might implode in a giant hairball. What both Cat Ladies have in common are a disheveled sense of simplicity. The lines and modernist colors of this nutty wardrobe immediately grab the eye. While the cat heads are abnormal, they quite nicely circularly accent the salmon pink robe. And cognitive recognition won’t pose a problem. Everyone can spot (and smell) a Crazy Cat Lady from miles away. Meow.

Runny Butt Medical Patient Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #90

From the 2007 Archives:

Apparently this Runny Butt Halloween Costume monstrosity comes with a bulb that you push to make things squish out of the butt. You will, however, need to purchase your own toilet paper. Butt-revealing hospital gown suggests that this prize is in the process of receiving medically treatment. For what? Anyone’s guess. Then again, those drawn to this costume need to be committed.

The Runny Butt Halloween Costume is available from E Costumes.

Department of Erections Excited Inmate Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #59

From the 2007 Archives:

Look, I don’t know if anyone’s seen OZ or even NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC: INSIDE SUPERMAX but inmates are SCARY. And the only thing more disturbing than a sociopath is a sociopath with a boner, as illustrated in the Department of Erections / Excited Inmate Halloween Costume. I’m not sure of Ted Bundy’s state when he impersonated Pa’s friend after stealing his wallet at a bar but I wouldn’t touch that pole with a 10-foot pole. And especially this guy who looks like he could use an intensive trip to the dentist. What’s up with the sneakers, by the way? Totally inauthentic. I thought they only let them wear pink slippers.

Country Lovin' Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #25

From the 2006 Archives:

The Country Lovin' Halloween Costume includes hat, jumpsuit, attached buttocks and inflatable lovin' lamb.  Narsty.  When did copulating with animals become humorous?  I didn't find it amusing at my old job when I trashed a scrip that had Korn forcing a groupie to seduce a goat and I don't find it amusing now.  I hope PETA comes and beats your sick rear, you sicko.  Ironically, the only people that would order this costume are the ones who've never had any human contact, if you know what I mean.

Man Baby Halloween Costume

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #23

From the 2006 Archives:

This Big Man Baby Halloween Costume isn't so much Halloween Fun as it's an episode of The Jerry Springer Show.  Hence, you're not highlighting your sense of humor, you're accentuating your deep dark issues.  And nobody's gonna wanna touch that with a 10-foot-pole.  Jerry!  Jerry!  Jerry!

The Big Man Baby Halloween Costume is available from Star Costumes.

Wacko Jacko Halloween Costume Mask

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #19

From the 2006 Archives:

Dare to celebrate the occasion as a man-child pedophile?  The Wacko Jacko Halloween Costume Mask in all its thoroughly inappropriate glory is the one for you!  Includes overly collagened lips, caved-in nose, perma-eyeliner, wig-ish hair and sad eyes.  Does not include baby-dangling Blanket.  If you deign to trick-or-treat at Tom Sneddon's house as Wacko Jacko, please take pictures.  If you don't, you'll be arrested.

The Wacko Jacko Halloween Costume Mask is available from Halloween Store.