Saturday, April 5, 2008

Dog The Bounty Hunter and Beth The Bounty Hunter Halloween Costumes

Inappropriate Halloween Costume #1

From the 2006 Archives:


One of the many catalogs The Oriental Trading Company spams me with every month shows up in the mail. I thumb through, checking if any of their products are high-quality enough to warrant purchase for my business. Nope. However, a particular section captures my interest… the Halloween Costumes. Their costume selections truly set the bar for tacky and inappropriate. And this is coming from someone whose scary ex-model Viola Swamp of a 5th grade teacher Ms. Bezold wore a jaw dropping, cover your eyes kids, sexy piratess outfit to our elementary school’s Halloween parade. A kid also trick-or-treated my parents' house dressed as the Unabomber. Out of his entire route that night, my Pop was the only one who correctly guessed his costume. Way to go Pops!


Among the Halloween Costume selections The Oriental Trading Company is peddling to consumers are matching Dog The Bounty Hunter and Beth The Bounty Hunter outfits, based on the A&E television show. In September [of 2006] Dog was arrested per the Mexican government for illegally bounty hunting in the country relative to the capture of serial rapist Andrew Luster. Although this [was] my top pick for Mikey and Vol's Halloween Costume for 2006, let's face it, if that load of black plastic and peroxide mullets showed up on your front stoop, I rather think you'd be fearing trick rather than treat. Both the Dog and Beth costumes come with knives with leg straps.


[Note: The charges against Dog were eventually dropped. But then came Dog's inappropriate racial tirade...]

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